Eric's Eulogy for our Dad

My brother Eric & I both gave the eulogy at our fathers funeral.  He went first and I followed him.  I got the text of what he said and thought I would share it.

 Hello everyone.  Thank you for coming.

Douglas Molepske was my father.

I am Eric, his youngest of five sons.

I am not a public speaker.  I asked him for advice on speaking and he said go very slowly and take your time.  I’ve seen him give many great speeches.

He was a businessman, a father, a grandfather, a brother, a loving husband, a leader, and a man of principles.

My father went to church every Sunday and is a man of tradition.

He came to every single football game I played in.

When I was about 14 years old he saw me getting ready to go to school I was putting hair gel in my hair.  He said that hair gel was a waste of money.  When he was young, he said he would just put water in his hair, comb it, step out into the cold Wisconsin air and let it freeze into place.

This is a man that sacrificed everything for his family:  his body, his time, his energy, and his heart.

In honor of my father, I will ask that everyone here sacrifice one thing for a loved one or even a stranger.

I have regretted everything mean and hurtful that I have ever done or said.  I have yet to regret anything nice that I have ever done or said.

Thing my father loved more that anyone else!  Fishing, Chinese buffets, his 5 sons, The Boy Scouts of America, and his wife – my mother, Janyce Molepske.

I have often struggled with my faith.  I prayed for 2 things . . . that it would not rain for my father’s visitation last night and that it would not rain for his funeral this morning.  (Eric raises his hands . . .  the congregation responds with approval).

Practically, every combination of words has already been said, so I will end with two quotes.

“We inherit from our ancestors, gifts so often taken for granted.  Each of us contains within this inheritance of soul.  We are links between the ages, containing past and present expectations, sacred memories, and future promises.”

“What the caterpillar perceives as the end, to the butterfly, it is just the beginning.”

If you'd like to read my eulogy, you may find it by clicking here.

Eulogy

I lost my father & friend a week and half ago.  You can read his obituary by clicking here.


My brother Eric's Eulogy was first and I followed him.  You may find his eulogy by clicking here.


A week ago we burried him.  I had the tremendous honor of giving his eulogy.  I've typed it out this morning, because this is who my father was:

The laws of Doug Molepske

A Scout is:  Trustworthy, Loyal, Helpful, Friendly, Courteous, Kind, Obedient, Cheerful, Thrifty, Brave, Clean, and Reverent.

This is the Scout Law, but what I’m going talk about is the Doug Laws.

Doug is Prepared

I know, all the Scouts and Scouters in the room know that Lord Baden Powel said this first, but my father took it to a whole new level.  I always made fun of the number of things he kept in his pocket, (took out cell phone) Steve, I know dad would have never kept a cell phone in his pocket. (took out a pocket knife), my father always had a pocket knife in his pocket.  (took out a comb), I went through my fathers stuff, because he always had a comb in his pocket.  Lindsay, you were wondering where Preston got his cowlick from, I always remember my fathers cowlick! (took out handkerchief), dad was always prepared with a handkerchief! (took out a pen from left pocket), anytime you ever needed a pen, my dad always had a pen or 2 handy in his left hand pocket.  I use to make fun of my dad for keeping way too much stuff in his pockets,,, until one day I came home from work only to realize how much stuff I had in my pockets and I said, dear lord I’ve become my father!  Next thing you know, I’ll be going to the store wearing black socks with tennis shoes, a 20 year old shorts, & a white t-shirt!

As I was going through my fathers items, in his file cabinet, under “c” was a file called Constitution.  I thought, what was in there… only to discover that it was a copy of the United States constitution.  The only thing I could figure, was if the movie Independence Day really happened, and Washington DC was destroyed, my father would be able to say, “I know how we can rebuild it!  I have it right here!”

Doug is Cheap (he would of called it thrifty)

 believe there are about 10 Chinese buffet’s that are going to go out of business in about a 20 mile radius from here.  At one particular restaurant one of the waitress called my dad 1 dollar . . . because that is what he tipped.

When my brother Greg came home from Iraq I had purchased some really nice cigars, but my dad stuck to his $1 cigar, when I asked him why he always smoked those he said, “I Like these, why spend more?”

My Uncle Don shared a story about my dad with me, that he went to the circus with his granddaughter Molly.  In typical Molepske fashion said, “now we’re not going to spend any money once we get there.” But there was an opportunity to ride the elephant, and Molly wanted to. Uncle Don retold the story to my dad, and my dad agreed that it was okay to spend money like that for a memory.  Because sometimes love costs.

My Cousin Mike showed up Friday night, and I thanked him for coming and he replied, “I had to come, Uncle Doug gave me my first roll of nickels.”  Uncle Dick quickly responded, “Yeah, he had you fooled thinking that was a lot of money.”

A typical fence lasts about 10 years I’ve discovered at my house, but not Doug Molepske’s fence… he made his fence last nearly 30 years!  Every time I came home it felt like my dad said, “let’s go fix the fence.”  I always enjoyed it because I was able to spend time with my Dad, but finally last summer, I told him, “Next time you need to repair this fence, I think it’s time to build a new one.” And he finally did.

Doug is Practical

I love cartoons, and my Dad would always tell me how grown ups don’t watch cartoons.  Cartoons are for children.

Did you know my dad use to own the first Superman comic book?  Yes, but practical Doug got rid of it when he was a teenager because it was childish… little did he know what it would be worth.  I’ve always found it funny that rule #3 got in the way of rule #2.

For the longest time, I always thought my name was number 2 son, because that’s how he’d introduce me.  As I got older I’d always add, “Hi my name is Tim.”

He had this handkerchief always in his pocket that he’d blow his nose in literally every portion of it.  One time my nose was running and he tried to offer it to me, and was thoroughly confused when I refused.  I could see the inquisitive look as he tried to understand, “I need to blow my nose, he has a handkerchief, I don’t, why don’t I just use it?”

My mom told me the day they got married, that the tire needed to be replaced on the car and he wasn’t going to wait… it had to be done right then so the car would be ready.  My mom was hoisted up car and all while the tire was changed!

Doug tells stories & Jokes

He would always say to me, you’re not going to believe this, but from the mundane to the funny, I always believed him.

He’d sometime do this thing with his arm, that he would pump it back and forth in a dramatic fashion as he was really getting into his story.

Mom, two Pollock’s were on their way up north to go ice fishing, but they had to come back because they didn’t have a big enough bucket for the ice (my mom’s favorite joke my dad would say)

I loved the twinkle in his eye as he would tell his stories!

Doug is forthright

There was no mixing his words, if he had an opinion… and he thought it was right, you’d know it.  This is going to be a group participation thing because I don’t have a story, but if you’re here, and you know this to be true . . .and you have your own story… raise your hand. (almost 85% of the audience raised their hand)

Doug liked to compete        

He always wanted to win!  Greg, him, & I were fishing.  And I started cracking up because he was catching the smallest fish that I didn’t even think was possible to catch!  I finally asked him why he was catching all the small ones, and he looked up at me and said, “sometimes the quantity is the quality.”  And it was game on!  I tried to match his bait and catch as many as he did, but he won that day. 

Most importantly, my Dad competed against himself.  Always wanting to do better than he did before.  And more importantly than himself, he competed to do it right.

Doug is do it right

“Do it right or don’t do it at all” and “Job worth doing – job worth doing well” were to of his favorite sayings he told me growing up. 

My dad and I would have lots of discussions about volunteers who would just wear a patch.  And I remember in one discussion he passionately exclaimed, “Don’t just wear a patch… do something with it.”

Oh, and the times he’d tell me about some poor district executive who didn’t get Doug Molepske his reports on time.  (I acknowledged a couple district executives with whom he worked)  if the report was due on the 2^nd by 5pm, he was calling you at 8am asking why you cant do your job!

Doug is Proud

Steve, he was so proud of you!  I remember the day you graduated from University of North Texas and Dad didn’t know what to say and he looked at you with tears in his eyes and gave you thumbs up.

Greg, the day you graduated from basic and he was able to help pin on your badge.  The look of pure joy in his face!

Jeff , of all your friends you brought around that would watch football or just hang out.  He’d always tell me anytime you had friends over and who was doing what.

Eric, of your own thoughts…. Albeit he’d disagree with you, but would be so proud you were your own person trying to understand the world from your perspective.

Doug is Family

He would go to every family reunion, update the family book, and always try to keep the most up to date contact information.

I remember being in Troop 703 in Wichita, Kansas and my dad stood up at a court of honor and read Cats in the Cradle, and with tear filled eyes exclaimed to the parents, “Time spent is time earned” I don’t know how many parents chose to get involved that day, but I was 11 and I remembered that… and so every opportunity I got I spent it with my dad.  Because he earned my time.

Doug believed Love is a verb

Why use words when actions mean more?

He loved life, he loved wife, he loved us boys, oh and how he loved his grand kids, loved his brothers! 

Doug is Belief

He was a man of faith. Every Sunday, sat in the same spot at 10am mass.

He believed in the values of Scouting, and finished every commissioner meeting with, “For the Boys”

One of his favorite movies of all times was Follow Me Boys, and the final lyrics were:

So the journeys end,

Is beyond our sight,

Follow me boys, follow me

If we do our best

Then we’ve done all right

Pack your load, hit the road

And follow me

Dad, I don’t know when I’m coming home, but we’ll get together then, we’ll have a good time then.